Bad Neighbors, Part 3

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He was still anxious and angry as he started right back at me. "What are you doing out here!", he said. "You're living here, aren't you!"

"Yeah, I live here," I admitted.

"Oh I know you do! I keep track of you. I see where you park your truck and I know when you're here," he said. What? He's been monitoring my comings and goings? Now I was the one who was starting to feel uncomfortable.

I understood why he was uncomfortable with me living there. And, assuming he was a family man, I even understood his anger and aggressiveness. He was protecting his "territory", which for him I suppose included the adjacent property, so long as there was a strange man there living in a tent. But I still thought this whole situation could be defused if only he would get to know me a little and realize that I was no threat to him or his family.

"Hey look," I said, "I know this is strange, and I realize you're probably thinking the worst, but believe me there's nothing shady going on here. The landowner is a friend of mine, and I live this way by choice. It's something I've always wanted to try. And since you and I are neighbors..."

"We're not neighbors!!" he interrupted. "Do you own the property here? Do you pay taxes? No! So don't call me your neighbor! You're not my neighbor!" That statement sent alarms through me. It was dehumanizing, and that can lead to a dangerous situation. I tried to stay calm, but this guy was much more upset than I had first imagined. And now I wasn't quite sure that talking this thing out was going to work.

"Okay, fine," I said, "but I still consider you to be my neighbor, and I don't want to make your life miserable. I'm trying to live in peace here, and if you're this upset over the situation then that upsets me, too."

For the first time, I could see his face beginning to soften just a little. The deep frown was beginning to relax. Maybe I was getting through to him.

"Look," I continued, "what is it exactly that's bothering you? What can I do to help you feel better about this?" He looked at me and paused for just a moment. I got the feeling that he'd never actually thought about that question. He just knew that he didn't like me there and he wanted me gone.

"Well, why do you have to camp right here? Right next to my driveway?" he asked. "I mean, I like camping, too, but out in the woods somewhere, not on some one's property like this. And what do you do about your toilet? I mean, where do you go?" he continued.

"I compost my waste," I said. "And when I set up here, I didn't realize your driveway was so close. I was trying to get toward the back of my friend's property to get away from the road, but I guess I went in too deep and ended up near your driveway."

"Look," I continued, "I was thinking about moving next Spring anyway, and now you've got me thinking even more seriously about it. But this stuff is a bitch to move, and Winter's comin' on. Can you at least tolerate me until Spring?"

"Hey, I don't want to chase anyone away," he countered. "If you wanna leave then that's up to you." I was glad that he was showing more respect towards me now. And his anger was nearly gone.

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