Wednesday, February 11, 2015

"Farewell, Aquarius"

There’s a scene in the movie, “Apollo 13”, in which the three astronauts, Haise, Swigert, and Lovell, are approaching Earth for reentry. They crawl back into the command module from the lunar module. The lunar module, Aquarius, was just a small, frail craft, but to them, it was much more. “She sure was a good ship”, one of them says as they jettison the craft. “Farewell, Aquarius, and we thank you”.

I lived in a canvas wall tent for three years. It was a wonderful time in my life. The tent itself was just a large piece of fabric, but to me, it was much more. It was my home. It’s where I experienced things that I will never forget. It’s where I regrouped and found my bearings. It’s where I found peace and solitude during troubled times. It’s where I learned how simple life could be. Where I found the rhythms of Mother Earth and heard most clearly from God.

And now, having learned a great deal from it all, it is time to return to my fellow humans and live a more “normal” life among them.
I’m bringing the lessons of tent living with me. The knowledge that we have all been given everything we need to live a happy life, if only we can appreciate those blessings. The understanding that my life is not to be spent living in the woods by myself but rather among the wonderful people that I already know, and those that I have still to meet. The people that I love, and will love, and who love me.
So I’m paddling out of my calm and peaceful cove, and reentering the mainstream of human society, with all of its sharp bends and turbulent eddies. The rough waters of human society used to trouble me a great deal, but now I’m eager to embrace the rapids and paddle alongside the rest of humanity.
I know what it’s like to live a simple life. It’s wonderful, and the peace and security of that lifestyle is always there, for each of us, if ever we wish to live it. It’s with that experience and knowledge that I now return to mainstream society. We are all a bit crazy, and all so beautiful, and by far the most interesting creatures on the planet. So farewell, my canvas tent, and I thank you. I’m gonna go hang out with my fellow humans now.

 

21 comments:

  1. David,
    I knew there was change in the offing for you. I am so happy for you! I know you will carry the lessons of your life in the tent and all the Peace you found there for the rest of you life. Life is about changes and January was a momentous time for me also.
    I will write more when I return from an errand that I have to leave for shortly.
    Ronnie

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  2. David,
    Mother died on January 18 after having been moved into the nursing home on December 3. She was granted the Grace of a peaceful death on a bright and beautiful Sunday morning. She had told us when we were young that when she died she did not want "any" makeup on her face. She was buried in the gown she died in with nothing done to her body except placing it in the coffin. She was a simple, decent and loving person who always believed in the Resurrection to Eternal Life. May she Rest In Peace until the trumpet sounds!
    Ronnie

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    1. So sorry for your loss, Ronnie. She is at peace now, and in your heart always. You have been such a good son, my friend. I know that she is very proud of you. Bless you, brother. You are in my prayers.

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  3. What changed?
    Why leaving now?

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    1. The full answer to that is very long. But the short answer is that it became very clear to me a few weeks ago that my time in the tent was over, and that I now have other work to do. Throughout last year, I had prayed for such clarity. I never expected that the answer would be to leave the tent, but it was. It's now time to take what I have learned and share it in a different way.

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  4. David, good luck with your 'return' I have really enjoyed reading your posts. Will you still be posting?

    Mark.

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    1. Thank you, Mark. And yes, I'll still be writing, but I'm not sure what form that will take. It feels like it's time to start a new blog for this new chapter.

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  5. David,
    Why not let the " tent" become the metaphor for all that you learned in those three years and bring that into your present and future writing. Essentially, that is what will happen anyway. But then you may need a wider audience for your substantial writing abilities and you know enough about the technology to make that happen. Alas, I am unable to advise your there--my skills in that area are non-existent.
    Please know that I appreciate your allowing me to voice my grief and loss here--which was presumptuous on my part. Thank you. Whatever you decide, I wish you the best that life has to offer. Take care and be well.
    Ronnie

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    1. Ronnie,
      I have truly enjoyed corresponding with you on this blog. You have never been presumptuous in my eyes. You have shared your thoughts and feelings with openness and honesty, and that is always a wonderful thing, no matter the forum. So I thank you for that.
      Indeed, the tent experience will always be with me now, and I will continue to write as I live this normal lifestyle, so the two will become one. At the moment I am in transition, but I can already say with certainty that many of the simple truths that I learned while living in the tent were lost long ago, and can no longer be found in our modern way of life. Simple things, like the ability to distinguish between needs and wants, and what it means to be secure and independent. I know that God will always provide for all of our needs, regardless of the state of our fragile social institutions. And I know what true freedom feels like now. And so as I wander around this modern society, I will write about these things, and share my perspective.
      Please do stay in touch, Ronnie. I've enjoyed corresponding with you and consider you my friend, even though we've never met. Take care, my friend.

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  6. Aww. Whatchya doing with the tent and all?

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    1. I have kept all of the contents and my personal effects, and have traded the tent structure itself for a washer and dryer. So my days at the laundromat are over for now, and I will wash my clothes in a much more convenient fashion. Oddly, I feel that I did well in the bargain, given the laws of supply and demand, for I traded a small canvas home, which almost nobody wants these days, for a matching set of major appliances, which nearly everyone seems to desire.

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  7. David,
    I must say that I have enjoyed corresponding with you as well. I will always value the connection that we made through your blog and I know I got more from it that I can express. I still want to make that organic garden across the road and I have to decide what kind of structure will be my home, but I know what I learned from your words and experience will guide me. I will always consider you my friend.
    Ronnie

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  8. Hi, hope you are doing well!

    Mark.

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    1. Hi Mark! Good to hear from you, and sorry for the late reply. I haven't been very active on this blog lately. I'm 4+ months into retirement now, and still adjusting, but I'm doing well. Still living a pretty "normal" life in an actual house with electricity and plumbing and all the trimmings. It's very comfortable, and my situation is such that I don't have many bills so no financial stress to speak of. I don't miss tent living really, but I often reminisce about all the wonderful moments of living so freely. So I'm doing well, and no regrets. Hope all is well with you, too.

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  9. David,
    I am looking at doing something very similar to what you are doin and I have a few questions. How can I contact you?

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    1. Hi Josh! Please feel free to mail me at daveshilling1958@gmail.com. I would be happy to share my experiences with you.

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  10. Oh wow I just came to this and now you're no longer living in your home in the woods :( what a beautiful way to live! The tent itself was a gorgeous home! You're such a lucky man to have had that as long as you did. And there is no one saying you can't do it again ;) good luck to you in any and all new adventures ahead.

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    1. Thank you so much, Meghan. It was such a blessing to be able to live in a tent for so long. That experience changed me forever. I learned to much, and the lessons will always be with me. Thank you for your kind wishes.

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  11. Hi David....so a year on, how's life? Made the right decision?

    Best wishes, Mark E.

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    1. Hi Mark!

      Hope all is well with you, and thanks for thinking about me.

      Well, after a year, I'm still alive and well and happy, and I'm still living in the same house that I moved into when I left the tent. So my housing situation hasn't changed much in this past year, but I have had another big change in my life.

      Last October, I married my girlfriend and lover and partner in everything, Jeanie. She and I had been living together since I left the tent, and are now officially husband and wife!

      I haven't really missed the tent so far, but I do think about it often. It was a magical time in my life. And the lessons that I learned there are still with me, like the truth about our relationship with Nature, and our place in the web of life on this planet, and how we've all gotten pretty far away from all that, including me now.

      When I left the tent, I knew it was time. It was time to live a more normal lifestyle among my fellow humans. But I also realized that living a conventional lifestyle, with all of its comfort and convenience, would tempt me and pull me away from Nature, which indeed it has. My close connection with Nature has slowly faded over this last year as I've been more removed from it. But I still remember, and I still know it to be true, and that belief still guides me.

      I will be further tested in my beliefs and convictions in the coming months as Jeanie and I begin a new housing project. We'll be building a small, timber frame and straw bale house on a very limited budget. Jeanie, the woman I love, has a much more conventional view of housing, while I still remember how wonderful it was to live in a canvas home. So there will be plenty of opportunity to find our points of balance, and I smile to myself as I think about that new challenge.

      So yes, I still feel that leaving the tent was the right decision. No regrets there so far. And I suppose I've "re-assimilated" back into the normal lifestyle (perhaps too well!)

      Take care, Mark, and best wishes!

      Dave

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    2. Thanks for the reply! I'm glad that everything is going well for you and congratulations on your marraige. Your Blog was always an excellent read, so well written. Good luck with your new housing challenge!

      Take care,

      Mark.

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