Why I Left My Tent

I had always told myself that if I ever decided to leave my tent, I would move out in Spring or Autumn, never Winter. I would move out when the weather was at its best for tent living, and never let Winter's cold factor into my decision to leave. So what did I end up doing? I moved out in January, right in the middle of Winter. Not because it was too cold to continue with tent living, but because it was time to leave. It was time to rejoin society and start the next chapter in my life.

At the time that I left my tent, I had been living in it for about three years and had fully assimilated to the lifestyle. I had a comfortable home and a simple, peaceful life. I had just retired and was financially secure. But with all of those blessings, I was also completely unsettled. Retirement had disrupted my thoughts, forcing me to consider the question that so many of us ask, "What should I be doing with my life?" Signing my retirement papers was like cashing in a winning lottery ticket. No more financial worries! Nothing but leisure time! Great! But, now what?

And it wasn't just retirement that was disturbing me. Something else had been bothering me for some time. With each passing day, I had gotten further and further away from society. I felt more connected to the birds and the squirrels now, and less comfortable with my fellow humans. When you live a simple life, surrounded by Nature, everything in the world begins to make a lot of sense. Everything, that is, except for human society, with all of its self-inflicted pain and foolishness. I was becoming less and less tolerant of my fellow humans, and that was unsettling, too.

In January of 2015, it had all come to a head. I had been given the gift of total freedom and at the same time was on the verge of becoming a hermit! I felt lost and confused, and my instincts told me to retreat back to society. Perhaps it would have been better to leave my tent for different reasons, but I just wanted to go back home. Back to my fellow humans. I knew that it would be difficult. That I would have to work hard to remember what I had learned in the tent, and that over time I would probably come to view human society as "natural" once again. I was sure that staying in the tent would disconnect me further from society, and I was also sure that rejoining society would most probably disconnect me from Nature, but it was time. Time to go back home, before I slipped too far away.