Living in the Moment

I used to practise mindful meditation. The way I did it was to observe my own train of conscious thought. For example, as I drove down the road, I'd observe how my conscious mind would wander here and there while my subconscious mind and body would continue driving. I'd try to catch myself in these mental states and remind myself to "stay in the moment". To observe the grass and trees and fences as I passed them by. To stop reminiscing about yesterday. To stop thinking about tomorrow. To enjoy the experience of driving down the road.

That style of meditation worked well for me, especially when I was stressed or worried or depressed. So long as I could maintain that state of mindfulness, I was able to step away from my problems. But it was an active process that took a lot of focus and mental energy. It was work. And it always felt like I was somehow just treating the symptoms of my problems instead of addressing the causes. Even so, it was an effective tool that I used often, and it worked.

In the past several months, I've sort of forgotten about practicing meditation. At the same time, I feel like I'm living in the present moment now more than ever. What happened?

Well, I have a theory. If I look back on the times when I used to practice mindfulness, I see that it was always during difficult periods of my life. When I was worried about losing my job. Or when I would lay awake at night thinking about all the things I had to do the next day. I was treating the symptoms, but what were the causes?

I recently pondered that question and came up with this cause-and-effect chain:

That's how it used to be for me. I'd get stressed and worried over things that were out of my control, or bad things that I thought might happen in the future, or my never ending "to do" list.

As I searched for a "root cause" to my stress and anxiety, I found Materialism and Complexity. Tent living has eliminated Materialism and Complexity from my life. Is it any wonder that it's easier now to live in the moment without practicing mindful meditation?

Rain

It rained last night. It started as just a sprinkle at around 11pm, just when I had crawled into bed. As soon as I heard the first few random drops, I rolled over onto my back and laid quietly, a smile crossing my face, and listened. I had noticed crickets chirping earlier in the evening. It was the first time that I had heard them so loud, a nice sign of warming weather. So as the rain began, I listened to see whether I could still hear them in the background. But after just a few minutes, the storm intensified and drowned out all the other sounds.

My tent began filling with white noise. The rain fly is a thick poly tarp and it resonates at a low frequency when struck by raindrops. As the rain fell harder, the noise in the tent increased until the whole tarp buzzed with a low-pitched drone.

Soon, I was fast asleep. I awoke at 7am to my cell phone alarm. The rain was still going strong so I snoozed. And snoozed again. When I finally decided to get up, I remembered that I was out of water, but instead of walking to the water supply, I decided to place a pot outside along the eaves of the rain fly to catch some rain water for my bath. There was just enough potable water left in my container for a pot of coffee, so I made one and put it on the stove.

As my bathing pot filled with rainwater, and my coffee pot began to perk, I looked out onto the path to my home. It had become a little river, with large section being overtaken by runoff that was making its way to the creek just below my tent. I gazed for awhile longer until I started to smell the coffee. By then, my bathing pot was full so I brought it inside and put it on the stove to warm. Surprisingly, this was the first time that I'd collected rainwater that way, but it won't be the last. The rainwater was noticeably softer than the well water that I usually bathe in, plus I didn't have to walk through the rain to fetch it.

It's early afternoon now and the rain has stopped. The sky is starting to lighten and soon the sun will be out again. My path will be a muddy mess for a few days, and now that we're getting closer to Spring, it will be like that more and more often. But my nights will be good, and I'll sleep well as those Spring showers make their way to Virginia, and my rain fly.

On Being "Off the Grid"

Last week, we had our worst Winter storm so far this season. It started Tuesday evening around 8pm and got progressively worse through the night. The wet, heavy snow accumulated on everything, including on the pine tree branches above my tent.

At about 3am, the wind picked up and started blowing the accumulation from the tree limbs. My tent was bombarded with heavy slush-balls that made a loud "Pow!...P-Pow!...Pow!" as they crashed onto the rain fly. My lady, Jeanie, and our dog, Max, were spending the night, and we all three woke up and looked around as the bombardment began, trying to figure out what was going on. At first, I thought it must be tree limbs breaking and striking the tent, but it didn't really sound like that. Max was sitting up in the bed, fully alert, snapping his head from side to side as the slush-balls struck the tent over here, then over there, then over here again.

The bombardment continued on into the morning, and we had a hard time getting back to sleep. We finally gave up and crawled out of bed around 9am. As I put on the morning coffee, Jeanie mentioned that she'd have to call her daughters back home to see whether they'd lost power.

Fortunately, Jeanie's power was still on, but over the next few days I ran into plenty of people who had lost power due to fallen limbs and trees. And as I talked with people after the storm (people that weren't aware of my current lifestyle) they'd ask me: "Did you lose power?"

The first few times, I just said, "No, I didn't lose power", not wanting to get into long explanations. But that started bothering me a little because it wasn't exactly honest, so I tried, "Well, I'm not sure whether power went out in my area", which was closer to the truth, but led to questions like, "Oh? Where were you during the storm?" Oops. That didn't work, either, since I had to explain things anyway. Once I tried, "Well, I currently live in a tent without electricity", but that, of course, got me back into a long explanation.

Later that day, I came up with a nice, honest, short response: "I'm off the grid". There.

Being "off the grid" is something people have heard of and can relate to, unlike "living in a tent". When I say I'm off the grid I get questions like, "Really? Totally off the grid?", to which I respond with a simple, "Yep, totally", but that's it. No long discussion about tent living.

It's interesting that it never really occurred on me that I am, indeed, off the grid. It's been more of a byproduct of how I live than an objective. When one of my co-workers mentioned that he had always wanted to live off the grid (not knowing that I live in a tent), I said, "Well, it's pretty easy to do, but you have to make lifestyle changes". He said that he'd like to talk to me sometime about how I did it. So much for avoiding long conversations!

Recipe for Coconut Fried Roots and Salmon

Coconut Fried Roots and Salmon

1. Marinade one pound of sockeye salmon in a mixture of teriyaki, soy sauce, curry, black pepper, and beer for about an hour.
2. Heat about five tablespoons of coconut oil in a large skillet over medium-high heat.
3. Slice one potato, one turnip, and one onion. Put veggies in the oil and fry them until they're a little brown, then turn down the heat and cook until almost done. Add something hot and spicy, like diced jalapeno peppers or Asian peanut sauce.
4. Toward the end, move the veggies over to the side of the pan and fry the fish.

Garnish with a few slices of cheddar cheese and enjoy!

Oh hell yes!

Quiet Whispers from My Sanctuary

Several weeks ago, I hit a bump in the road of my life. I've been very blessed in so many ways throughout my life. I have three wonderful children, three incredible granddaughters, a good job, good health, my music, and good friends that I can always count on. But some weeks back, I hit a difficult period in my life that really got me sidetracked for awhile. I became angry and obsessive. And for awhile, I lost track of how lucky I am, and how wonderful life really is.

I started losing sleep, worry about my problems. I just couldn't shake the negative thoughts. They were consuming me. And even when I was home, in my tent, where I had always been so relaxed and carefree, even there I'd sit and stew about my problems.

Then, a few nights ago, I was home for the evening, tending to the fire, cooking dinner, and listening to music, and it dawned on me that I wasn't enjoying myself. I wasn't in that centered place anymore. I wasn't experiencing the calm and happiness that I usually did. I wasn't accepting the gifts that my sanctuary offers.

My home was trying to remind me of all the good things in life. Of how lucky we are just to be alive. Of how simple life can be. And with that gentle reminder, that quiet whisper, I started to come out of my slump.

Last night, finally, I smiled again, and had a good night's sleep. Thank you, my sanctuary, for taking such good care of my soul.

Staying Warm in the Winter

It's January now, and temperatures are dropping. My friends worry about me this time of year. They ask me how I'm doing. A few of them have invited me into their homes for the winter, or for a break from the cold. But I reassure them that I'm doing okay, and that I have Virginia winters in a tent pretty much figured out now.

January and February are the cold months in Virginia, with highs in the 40s and lows in the 20s. That's pretty cold, but I've been acclimating. I'm pretty comfortable now standing around in a T-shirt and bare feet at 35 degrees. (Well, for a little while anyway.) And some of these sunny January days feel downright balmy.

Not only am I acclimating to the cold, I'm also accepting the cold more now. I think that's another secret to staying comfortable. I expect my fingers to be numb as I gather tinder and kindling for the evening fire. And adjusting kerosene lamps and striking matches without the sense of touch is normal this time of year.

And then there are the warm time. The cozy times. Even the hot times, when I have to open the door and let some cold air in because the wood stove got too hot.

A lingering hint of wood smoke is always present in the tent this time of year, and I like that. Every time I open the stove door, a little puff of smoke escapes. But I don't like too much smoke. Turns out it takes very little smoke to set off a smoke detector in a 12' x 14' tent. "Beep! Beep! Fire! Fire!" I hear it every night. Granted, it's a friendly female voice that says, "Fire! Fire!", but it's still annoying.

I can get away with letting out one puff of smoke once in a while, maybe two. But if three of four escape it's, "Beep! Beep! Fire! Fire!", followed by me hitting the "hush" button on the smoke detector and opening the door to clear out the smoke. One minute it'll be 80 degrees and nice and cozy and I'll be putting another log on the fire, and the next minute I'll be running around, opening the door, and freezing again.

But usually, things work just fine and I stay warm. In fact, I've only had one wood stove failure this year. It happened the second night that I burned the stove.

It was the middle of the night, maybe 4am. I woke up to urinate and on my way back to bed opened the stove door to check on the fire. There was a wonderful bed of coals, maybe 5 inches deep, with a couple of pieces of nearly-burnt wood sitting on top. The fuel would soon be gone so I figured I'd load up the stove. I smiled thinking about how comfortable the rest of the night would be, and how I'd wake up to a nice warm tent.

I put in a few small pieces of wood first, then bigger ones on top of those. The coals were really hot so the smaller pieces took off immediately. Flames started roaring up the stove pipe as I placed more and more wood in the fire box.

As I finished loading the stove, the flames were still roaring so I got the poker out and moved the wood around a little to calm things down. It was right about then that I heard a, "Thwup!". What was that? Sounded like something went up the stove pipe. But what? No paper in there. Maybe...

Holy crap! Flames started belching out of the door! I shut it immediately. Now smoke was pouring out of the draft holes in the stove door! "Beep! Beep! Fire! Fire!"

I was still half asleep. I wasn't thinking straight. Everything was happening so quickly. "Beep! Beep! Fire! Fire!" It was dark but I could smell smoke. Thick smoke. I ran out of the tent.

I left the door open and smoke rolled out. I stepped away from the door to catch some fresh air. "Beep! Beep! Fire! Fire!" I was now standing outside in my underwear in 30 degrees, trying to compose myself and figure out what to do next.

I reached inside the door and grabbed my flashlight. The tent was filled with smoke from the ceiling down to within two feet of the floor. I could see thick smoke still pouring out of the draft holes. "Beep! Beep! Fire! Fire!"

Okay, I was wide awake now. Don't breathe the smoke. Don't even breathe near the floor. You've already inhaled too much. "Beep! Beep! Fire! Fire!" Hold your breath, go close the draft, and kill that damn smoke detector!

Ready? Go!......Done, and back outside.

Okay, think. There was that "Thwup!" noise. What the hell was that? Damn it's cold out here! Sounded like paper going up the pipe. But no paper in there. Bark? Maybe bark? Damn it's cold!

I shined the flashlight back in. The smoke was starting to clear. I could see what was going on a little better now. The stove wasn't smoking, but smoke was seeping out of the cracks in the stove pipe. That meant the obstruction was outside, high in the pipe. But how? What was going on? Damn it's cold!

Okay, hold your breath and go get some clothes!...Okay, back outside.

I stood on the stoop for some time, waiting for the pipes to stop seeping smoking, but they never did. One more dash into the tent to grab my pillow and sleeping bag, then out to my truck for the night.

The next day, I took apart a section of stove pipe and immediately found out what had happened. I had installed new pipe. Black pipe. Black painted pipe. And the paint had peeled from the inside of the pipe. The "Thwup!" that I had heard was the sound of a sheet of peeled paint breaking loose on three sides and hinging itself nice and tight in the stove pipe. A fine obstruction. In fact, there were two obstructions just like that!

That was an exciting night. I've had other nights when the smoke has chased me out for awhile. Like when I tried to build the fire too quickly and the whole thing went out and smoked up the place. Things like that. But usually it's warm and cozy. So don't worry, friends. I'm hanging in there. And Spring is getting closer all the time!

Installing the Wood Stove

It's mid-December now and time to get the wood stove going. So far, I've been heating with kerosene. It raises the temperture in the tent by 40 degrees so it's been fairly comfortable up until now, but I don't burn the kerosene through the night and mornings are pretty damn cold as a result. Soon, the kerosene won't be able to keep up with the drop in temperature so it's time to start burning wood. I feel safe keeping the wood going through the night, so my mornings are about to get a lot more comfortable, too!

I heat my tent with a Yukon II wood stove. It has a 2 cubic foot firebox which provides a 6 to 8 hour burn time. The stove is specially designed for tents. It's lightweight and easy to install and remove. It has a tent heating capacity of 14' x 16' at zero degrees, and 10' x 12' at 30 below. My tent is 12' x 14' so it really does the job, even during those bitter-cold, windy winter nights, as long as you tend to it properly.

Yukon II tent stove

I ordered my tent with a pre-installed stove jack in the back wall. The stove jack consists of a sewn-in piece of heat-resistant fabric with a 5" hole in the center, just the right size to receive the 5" stove pipe required by the Yukon II. To install the stove, I just run 5" stove pipe from the stove, right out through the stove jack, and then extend it out and up, well away from the tent and rain fly.

Last year, I had a difficult time hanging the stove pipe. Nothing in a tent is solid, so it's a challenge to hang the pipe. I had ended up just cobbling things together with wire and hangers, but I never liked the results. This year, I decided to solve some of those problems.

What was needed was a solid metal post outside, so I drove a 10' piece of conduit a few inches into the ground, then anchored the top of the conduit to the 4x4 rain fly post with a piece of angle-iron.

Vertical piece of conduit attached to the rain fly post

With the metal post in place, I ran a 7' section of pipe from the stove jack in the back wall of my tent to the metal post outside. I angled the pipe upward at about 45 degrees and attached the high end of the pipe to the outside metal post. Then I attached the other end to the interior tent frame.

One end of the pipe attaches to the outside post...

...and the other end to the interior tent frame

The woods that I live in are covered with pine trees, and the ground is thick with pine needles. It's a tinder box, so I can't let any sparks leave the stove pipe. After doing some research, I decided to build my own spark arrestor. I just couldn't find anything safe enough on the market, especially for 5" stove pipe. I constructed my spark arrestor from 1/4" welded wire screen. I went twice around with the screen so the final openings, with the screen overlapping itself, are close to 1/8". That's a lot better then the 3/4" openings of most spark arrestors on the market. I capped the screen with a 6" pipe cap to help keep the rain out, then attached the bottom of the screen to a piece of 5" stove pipe using a hose clamp.

Spark arrestor for the top of the stove pipe

I attached the completed spark arrestor to a 2' section of pipe, then attached the whole assembly to the 7' section of pipe that I had hung previously.

With the spark arrestor in place, the exterior pipes are complete

Next, I moved to the inside to complete the installation. I connected the stove to the outside assembly using a 4' section of pipe and a couple of elbows.

Final section of interior pipe in place

Tonite I'll light the stove for the first time this year. I'll have to leave the door open for awhile because new stove pipe gives off some initial fumes. I'm ready for winter now, and ready to wake up to a warm tent on snowy winter mornings!